Where are we going mama?
Why do we have to leave?
I am going through my babies
clothes, blankets, and food.
I place them quickly in my
sons diaper bag.
Mama what about me ?
Am I going with you ?
Yes ' Ivanna , now lay out
some clothes and a few
dolls and I will help you
put them in your backpack !
Mama why are you crying ?
I don't have much time to
explain , we have to catch
a train to Poland.
But what about Father and Fedir ?
Aren't they going with us ?
No, they can't go right now
they have to stay. They will
try to join us later O-K?
Yes, Mama !
My brain is going a mile
a minute. It was only a
few days ago we took a
walk to the park and
had lunch at the coffee shop!
Now my family is forced out
of our home and everything we
know!
Because of evil we have to
leave our own country!
We are forced to leave our
families, friends, and
neighbors for what?
Greed !
There is an eerie stillness of
silence that has consumed us.
We have so much to say but
the words are unspoken.
I keep seeing Fedir playing
soccer with his friends after
school and now his life has
become something none of
us recognize!
He is my first born and his
name means" gift from above."
My husband sits quietly near
the window seal with weapons
at his side.
The curtains are closed and
our electricity is turned off
by our enemy.
Oh my heart is aching !
How can I leave them?
The only sound in our home
is our clock sitting alone on
a shelf.
I am thankful little Antin is
sleeping in his stroller
while we load up our things.
He's a happy baby and filled
with smiles that warms our
hearts.
Hearing the ticking of the clock
is reminding me I must hurry!
My husband double checks our
belongings and makes sure
we have all our important
identification and documents.
He gently bends down and
kisses Antin on his tiny head
not to awake him.
He picks up Ivanna , and
gives her the biggest hug.
He tells her to be good
for Mama and help out
with her baby brother.
He tells her he will
see her soon.
Tears flow from his face
and he tells Ivanna, that
Daddy loves her!
I notice Fedir is sitting
alone on his bed with his
head hanging low. I go
to him and see his soccer ball
over in the corner of his room.
I see this young teenage boy
who was once full of life with
energy and smiles!
Now I see my Fedir with
fear and emptiness.
Oh my God !
How do I say goodbye to my
son !
Ivanna, goes over to Fedir
and gives him a hug. She tells
him not to worry and we will be
back O-K ?
Look ! I have toys for Antin and
I will play with him on the
train !
Fedir slowly nods his head yes!
He holds Ivanna and gives
her a kiss and tells her that
he loves her.
He stands up and hugs me
tight and says, "I love you Mom."
I hug him tight and tell him ,
"I love you my brave son,
I will keep praying and
asking God to
protect you and your father."
Fedir walks to the door and
tears flow as he looks at
his baby brother. He kisses
his tiny cheek and softly speaks
it's time for you to go Mom!
I look at our family crucifix
on our living room wall and
can barely say goodbye.
My husband and I embrace
one last time and I walk out
the door.
This time instead of visiting
our nearby park, we are
fleeing from
our home.
I push the loaded down
stroller with Ivanna's hand
holding onto mine.
I glance back and see
Fedir waving through
the glass window.
I have a quick vision
of him holding his
soccer ball on the
front steps and now
he is forced to hold
a gun.
I wave my last wave
to my son with tears
flowing from my face
and walk
forward.
We finally reach the
train station.
With all the noise and
chaos we made our way
up the steps of the train
and took our seats.
I try so hard to be brave
and strong for Ivanna
and Antin. I pull out
my bible and hold on to
my rosary and begin
to pray.
Suddenly, the loud whistle from
the train blows ! My heart begins
to beat ever so fast as we begin to
move forward!
I look out the window of a place
I once knew! I ask myself
an empty question ,"Will I
ever come back ?"
Oh ' my heart and soul is
breaking!
Give my husband strength my God!
Protect Fedir and keep him strong!
Please help them all!
Please don't let that be
my last wave!
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Place Your Divinity Upon Ukraine : 2-28-2022
