John 8:12 "I am the light of the world."

Wednesday, November 15, 2017

Lori Foster's Conversion in 1992


Written on May 3, 2014
This is the day my soul changed and my heart changed.
I was twenty-eight years old
My freedom of Christ began in a bathroom with
tears of sorrow and complete Joy !
I turned towards God !
My fourth child Adam  was born April 11, 1992 and my oldest child Jessica was entering into kindergarten. I was so excited to be able to send her to Sunday school!
She would be learning her Christian Catholic faith with other children.
She would be making her First Holy Communion few years after.  I wanted her to have what I had as a small catholic child. the truth of Christ words and His gifts in the Holy Sacraments.

Suddenly Christ showed me the importance of my own catholic role as motherhood , a Christian wife and mom.  I certainly wasn't living completely what God was wanting for me and my children.
I was in need to be a light for them. I began thinking how are they going to believe in the fullness of Our Lord when they aren't witnessing strength and true beauty from their own mother.
My family always went to Mass, and our large crucifix was always placed in our home.  It always gave me strength and hope , however I often unknowingly passed it by .  I never stopped and simply reflected on it the way Jesus was calling me. Look at me ; I could feel him telling me.

My days kept being busy with my four small children. My love was always given to them and my wonderful husband.  God was looking at my task and he blessed me, however he was still calling me Look at me ! Going to Mass was what we as a family did together and I knew it was the anchor of my whole life , however guilt was fogging it up.  I was becoming a person God wasn't pleased about and I knew it .

I was a busy stay at home mom whom I loved and Jesus loved , however the weekends came and I wanted to you might say party ; never the bar scene ; simply drink with friends and have a good time.  Well, to much to drink on the weekends was beginning to smack me in the face.
Guilt kept entering into my soul for I was one of those people who wouldn't stop drinking at a few drinks. I had plenty and God was most saddened.  Here I am excited my children will be entering Sunday School and receive Christ in the Holy Eucharist ; His Body and His Blood and look at me ! I wanted to change for myself ! I wanted Lori back ! I knew I wasn't fooling God and I wanted Jesus back ! 

I began working on myself. I began noticing the crucifix more as I passed by it, and Jesus kept telling me to look at him! Well days went by and weekends passed and my drinking continued on the weekends.  I had a large crucifix my parents had given to us hanging in our dining room. I had a smaller crucifix hanging in our bedroom and you can view it from the connected bathroom.
I dropped Jessica off for afternoon kindergarten and  placed my children comfortably for their naps. I went to our bathroom and shut the doors for it had two doors.  I cried out to God ! I placed my back against the wall and feel to the floor.  I pleaded to Jesus and said "Please God help me ! "
"Take this alcohol away from me ! "  I continued with my plea ,"I hate what it is doing to me and I hate that I want it every weekend ; Please take it away !"  I cried and cried ;
I begged and begged ; I sobbed and sobbed placing my head between my knees. 
I opened up my bathroom door that led to our bedroom and there he was !  Jesus ! My crucifix on the wall !  It was the first time I truly focused on him with my complete self - Me-  Lori !
He showed me his love for me on the Cross and I could feel him telling me
Now do you see Me?  I instantly began working on myself with full force.
I found "My Clear Crystal Rosary" hidden inside my dresser drawer . I grabbed it and began to pray, pray, pray and I was loving it ! 

I began sleeping with my holy rosary and kissing the crucifix was the best thing ever !
Finding my rosary underneath my pillow in the mornings was as if I found the best treasure in the world !  It's mine and I adore it !  I adore Jesus , My God ! 
It's the rosary my parents had given to me and we would pray the rosary together on our knees in our living room.
Days would pass by and the weekends came and my drinking would shrink down to one or two beers and no mix drinks. More months would pass me by and I would limit myself to no more than two beers for the evening weekend gathering, with soda's in between them. I was praying my rosary almost daily and focusing on my crucifix everyday !
I was gaining the strength that God was giving to me for I was loving myself ! I was loving the wife that I was becoming. I was seeing my children more clearly on the weekends . I was enjoying them to the fullest instead of wasting away on alcohol that was ROBBING be of my motherhood .  On the weekends I would have joy with them , my husband and Jesus !  I finally responded back to Jesus ; I do see you and I love you so much ! Thank you for ALLOWING me to SEE YOU ON THE CROSS. 

Dear Reader , This story  of "My Conversion" I truly treasure," I could not have picked up my pen the day God inspired me to write " Army of Prayer and Rosary" that began March 1, 1994.  My writings all stem from my conversion in  finding myself again !  Since my conversion I have kept up writings in my journals and inspiring others to pray and look at Jesus on the Cross . He is  the one who lifts us up to himself and embraces us !
I am now fifty three years old,  and my husband and I have been married for thirty five years.
After our fourth child mentioned in MY Conversion story , we had two more children eight years later, Rachel and Isaac whom are three years apart.   We now have grandchildren whom we simply adore and cherish.
I hope you find my conversion inspiring and please share it with those whom you care about.
God Bless All My Readers Oh 'Lord  please grant them  Peace of Your Love. 
May you have a Blessed Thanksgiving and Christmas !  with my love , Lori 

Luke Ch 15. Verses 1-10 (Jesus speaks to the tax collectors and sinners and tells the story of the lost sheep.  " Rejoice with me because I have found my lost sheep. I will tell you , there will be more joy in heaven over one repentant sinner than over ninety nine righteous people who have no need to repent." 

***Jesus Mercy is GREATER than our sins ! AMEN 

NOTE: I can have a drink on occasion  even a margarita and I am not consumed in guilt. 
My dear one, we are all so precious to God . We are like crystals in his eyes. In our weakness and struggles Christ is constantly pouring out himself to us every time we call upon him and go to his Cross. Our Lord gives us his blessings of himself. One might say I am a little hard on myself , however the WALL I was building between myself and the Cross was much harder.  On Feb. 16, 1995 Jesus showed me himself dying on The Cross in a dream and he blessed me . ( If I chose to do NOTHING at all ; I still have made a CHOICE

MY RELAPSE IN OCT. 1995 / 1-3-2018





ALWAYS (song)




My Given Dreams , by Lori Foster / 9-28-17

Army of Prayer and Rosary  / 9-27-16