My Relapse in Oct. 1995

It was Oct. 1995, the weather was warm and my life was going great !
I have been doing a wonderful  job on resisting and keeping away
from mixed drinks. Remember I shared (click here:
  my conversion in 1992 and
It had been three years of working on myself and I was enjoying
my family in a  new way !  I adored my new life of living for I had
been a weekend drinker since 1982 to 1992 / ages 18 through  28 . 

On Oct. 1995, I RELAPSE.
My husband and I were invited to a celebration of a close
friend of ours.  We decided to go and we found a babysitter
to watch our four children ages 3,5,7, and 9.
We dropped our off our children and met up with our group to
celebrate !
I was looking forward in spending time with our friends and
having a great time !
We all piled inside of this large vehicle with a designated driver.
I was a little nervous for I was told drinks would be inside
the vehicle.  I began to drink mix drinks and remember I haven't had
one for three years,  since my conversion of 1992.
We arrived at our restaurant that was about an hour long drive and
I barely remember eating my fancy meal.
We travel back to our city with our designated driver and the
mixed drinks kept coming.
It was getting late and we had to pick up our children.
My husband wasn't wasted , only I was.
We picked up our children whom were fast asleep , from
our babysitter's.
We began to drive home and I broke down and cried.
I  could not believe what I had just done to myself and
Jesus.  How could I have been so careless ?
Why didn't I have any resistance ?
My guilt was so overwhelming and I felt
like St. Peter crying after he denied his Lord, Jesus.
My husband could see my pain but only God knew
my loneliness and shame .
One or two days later God gave me my given dream:
 Click here: "In the Name of Jesus." 
Dear One's,
In this dream God placed me back into the same bathroom
where my conversion had taken place.
He REMINDED me how quickly Satan is ready to consume
me in my weakness. He showed me how powerful Satan is
and I must remain in Jesus at ALL TIMES.
Jesus also was asking me "Lori , you can not have me both ways."
He was reminding me of My Conversion back in 1992. This given
dream allowed Jesus to show me a open window of my life in
asking me "Is drinking again really what you want ?"
"Do you want to go back to your struggling ?"
"Do you want to remain on the ground for Satan
to keep you there ?"
Dear One's,
Jesus was asking me  very important questions "If you truly want to follow me
than I want your FULL ATTENTION and your ALL / not only part of you. 
This given dream was a "God Smack" to me.
As horrible as it was in placing my eyes onto Satan in the mirror it became
MY WEAPON.  
As much as I hated this dream it allowed me to see my
weakness of the weight of sin and my strength of standing up
against Satan . 
This dream REMINDED ME how little I am and I am nothing 
without Jesus. In the Name of Jesus is EXTREMYLY STRONG ! 
After the given dream I remembered all the gifts God had given to me and
that my family is relying on me. It reminded me in asking, " what kind of
mother I want to become to my children."
This dream was a great tool for my strength in Christ.
It allowed me to see how great my conversion was and how much
it meant to me and Jesus.
Satan will try to do whatever it takes to wipe away our accomplishments.
Satan will try to cover up our important things in our lives including our
spouse and children. He will try to cover it up with his darkness in 
trying to make us forget God's Light !


The Given Link to my dream:

In The Name of Jesus given dream ; posted 9-13-2017

***
What Appears to be Inviting can allow us to become
disconnected from ourselves and Jesus our God***

I am going to give you another dream God gave to me
only because I believe it may help those who are
struggling with alcohol and even drugs.

I had this dream in the early 2000's. after my Oct. 1995 relapse . I was doing
great !  My children were becoming young teenagers and I was feeling
real good about myself. Out of the blue and no where God gave me
a horrific dream. I never asked him why , I simply wrote it down in my journal,
and I looked at it as a tool.
Here is my dream:
I am standing alone in my kitchen.  I am looking down into this clear glass ,
full of whiskey. Suddenly , the whiskey becomes worms, and a large one
enters into my mouth and tries to make it's way down my throat. I pull and pull
and manage to get the worm out of my mouth. end of dream.
God was showing me  how powerful Satan can be.
WHAT APPEARS TO BE INVITING CAN ALLOW US TO BECOME
DISCONNECTED FROM OURSELVES AND OUR LORD, JESUS.

I had mentioned in my conversion how I can have one or two beers and
even a margarita on occasion and not be consumed.
I have learnt to be responsible and drink alcohol in moderation. 
I am praying for ALL who are "Embracing the Cross of Jesus."
yours in Christ,
Lori Foster

An Added note on My Relapse post / 1-6-2018 / video's ( To my reader ,
the added Note is below:

NOTE: 
I had to ask an important question in my own life.
What am I striving for and what can I not see myself doing without.
I was beginning to observe my weekend drinking 

and  I told myself , quote " How can
I have any kind of fun without alcohol ?  I knew I had a problem.
I learned to SPACE OUT my drinks for the evening or any kind
of celebration. I learned to limit myself to only two drinks for
the day or whatever event I was attending. I can simply walk out of
my house and sit on my porch with my husband and enjoy a beer
or small margarita.  I had to RETRAIN myself in MY OWN THOUGHT
PROCESS. If I found myself at an ALL DAY event
I knew I had to limit myself and be responsible in consuming

alcohol. 

  It takes  COURAGE TO 
RECOGNIZE ONES OWN PROBLEM . IT TAKES EVEN MORE
COURAGE TO STEP FORWARD AND DO SOMETHING
ABOUT IT. A quote from a rock band called Rush " If you choose to
do nothing at all , you still have made a choice."  

LORI FOSTERS  CONVERSION IN 1992

IN THE NAME OF JESUS GIVEN DREAM

EVERYTHING /song
Easier to Be / song
BY YOUR SIDE /song
Where Feet May Fail / song 
Lover of My Soul / by Kari Jobe
10,000 Reasons / with Matt Redman
10,000 Reasons , by Hillsong
Oceans Where Feet May Fail (lyrics)

THE SHORT WAY OF EMBRACE THE CROSS

  MY GIVEN DREAMS / 9-28-2017

  Dear One's  , if you are in need of HELP in your ALCOHOL OR DRUGS. Please be
strong and go to a priest or preacher and speak to them.  You will feel much better and
not alone.  Confide in a friend and ALLOW them to help you in anyway possible.
Here are some numbers you may wish to reach out to. Take My Story With You 
in your Heart and tell Your Own Story !!
Addiction Recovery : 855-808-6202  or 855-623-3024
Rehab for Addicts:  877-965-3313
They Are Waiting For YOU !  God Bless You Always, with my love,  Lori 

*** Every 15 minutes Program ( on embraceholycross.com)
Note: you will find links to three schools. The Pleasant Hill School is short and has a
song with it.  Please show your Teens !! 


Project Rachel & Gabriel , depressions, pregnancies, Addictions Resources.****